I was recently reflecting on what I'm looking for in a romantic relationship, and the song, "Feels Like Home," came to mind. Anyone else remember the 2003 rom-com, How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days and that sweet little scene where you can hear Chantal Kreviazuk's version of this song? I've always felt that scene was even more perfect because of the song, and almost 20 years later, I am reminded that a loving relationship should always feel like home. So, I decided this would be my next song to cover!
Something in your eyes Makes me wanna lose myself Makes me wanna lose myself In your arms
There's something in your voice Makes my heart beat fast Hope this feeling lasts The rest of my life
If you knew how lonely my life has been And how long I've been so alone If you knew how I wanted someone to come along And change my life the way you've done
Feels like home to me Feels like home to me Feels like I'm all the way back where I come from
Feels like home to me Feels like home to me Feels like I'm all the way back where I belong
A window breaks down a long dark street And a siren wails in the night But I'm alright 'cause I have you here with me And I can almost see through the dark there is light
If you knew how much this moment means to me And how long I've waited for your touch If you knew how happy you are making me I've never thought that I'd love anyone so much
Feels like home to me Feels like home to me Feels like I'm all the way back where I come from
Feels like home to me Feels like home to me Feels like I'm all the way back where I belong Feels like I'm all the way back where I belong
-Lyrics from Feels Like Home, by Randy Newman, 1995
As I was recording the song, I wanted to capture the same gentle and vulnerable vibe that Chantal brought to her version, but it was also important that I explored my own raw and real emotions. What's special about this song is it poetically expresses all the wonderful feelings of being in love: the attraction of the eyes and voice, the sensations in the heart, and the tenderness of a loving touch. It's intimate, but I want to focus more on the symbolic intimacy of home that's represented throughout this song.
The feelings of "home" in a relationship are cozy, comforting, and welcoming. We feel accepted for who we are, even with our faults and imperfections. There's no fear of judgment or abandonment. And there's a sense of belonging that takes us back to how we first felt around those loving family and friends. We can recognize that our first experience of home has helped us to grow as beautiful souls who have learned more about self-love, acceptance, and joyfully embracing others.
The part of this song that's the most vulnerable for me is where it says, "If you knew how lonely my life has been and how long I've been so alone." The truth is, I haven't found that forever "feels like home" feeling yet in a relationship and I've been single for a good majority of my life. It doesn't mean I'm losing hope, but I really know what it feels like to be alone, and it sucks sometimes! I've become stronger in that loneliness though—I've learned how to better love and accept myself. I also know exactly what "home" looks like and how I will feel when I find that special someone.
I imagine telling my future significant other how grateful I am that they've "come along" and "changed my life." That gratefulness comes from knowing that even though I've done just fine on my own, it's truly life-changing to have someone amazing to walk through life with. There is a significant amount of relief that comes from knowing that those often dark moments of loneliness are no longer—"through the dark there is light." So, the symbolic intimacy of two souls coming together to create "home" is a miracle in itself!
What's become incredibly therapeutic about connecting so deeply with this song is that by simply going through the process of singing it, I'm addressing that loneliness head-on while simultaneously manifesting what I want in a relationship—what I still believe is on its way! I'm also recognizing that I already belong, so that future relationship will only enhance those feelings of belonging that I've found within myself. I have to be at home with myself so that it's reflected in that relationship as well.
Hope this song takes you back to those rom-com feels, and reminds you to appreciate the feelings of home that already live within you!